I’ve been off the grid … I’m still mourning the loss of my little angel, Nica. I knew she was an important part of my life, but I never truly understood just how important until she was gone. People who have never committed themselves to their pet 110% really couldn’t understand the void left when they leave you.
My love affair with Nica started on day 57 of her life and it didn’t end the day she left me — 13 years, 4 months and 19 days — either. I loved her greatly whilst she was here, but I love her even more now than I did then. I’ve utilised many distractions to deal with her being gone — with my ‘work’ being one of them; however – home is a completely different story.
My morning, evening and night routines are all screwed up. Why? Nica was an integral part of all three of those each day … I know I’m not going to get over her quickly nor will she ever be replaced. She couldn’t be replaced — she was one in a bajillion.
I just hope that I did everything that I could do when I knew something was wrong … I did everything within my power, but it wasn’t enough. And I think that’s why it’s so hard for me to move even an inch forward. I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t even talk about her around friends any more. I just don’t think they want to hear about it. And that’s okay – because they all still ask – here and there – how I am and that matters in so many ways.
So many of you who follow have messaged me … I know that you don’t even know me personally; however, that speaks volumes about the fact there is still compassion in this world — even amongst strangers. I appreciate your kindness – it helps. Truly, it does.
So, I’m going to make a commitment to being back on track with my blog for 2014. And of course, I’m going to try even before we get there. They say time heals all wounds, but for now – this wound is deep and I cannot guess how long it will take.
To all of you … here’s to the true spirit of Christmas – love. I’m wishing you all of the good things that Christmas can bring.